We've been asked more than once if there were times when we couldn't find anything online to report, and our reply is that we miss reporting on ten times the articles we actually report on. Since our premise that Conservatism is a criminal enterprise, anything and everything the Conservatives say or do applies to this web site.
Today we report on a posting by Han Chimpson at Aattp.org (Check him out over at the Ayn Rand Collected Social Security Facebook page), "15 Mind-Numbingly Dumb Things TEApublicans Have Said Lately," inspired by a slightly feyish impulse to sit back and enjoy a few laughs, with the added benefit of a bit of an education.
From Mr. Chimpson, the posting in toto:
"As we all know, TEApublicans say some of the most shockingly dumb things imaginable. Without their zany quotes, there would be a whole lot less content on this blog, and a whole lot less laughing (or crying?) by liberal people everywhere. So while we could have easily come up with a top 100 list, here is a list of top 15 of the dumbest things TEApublicans have said, with a bias towards the most recent quotes over older ones. These are in no particular order, but feel free to comment on which quote you find to be the most egregiously idiotic. Enjoy…
1. “People now don’t die from prostate cancer, breast cancer and some of the other things.” – Chris Collins, New York GOP State Rep.
2. “You would be giving off more CO2 if you are riding a bike than driving in a car.” – Ed Orcutt, Washington GOP State Rep., stating that bicycles pollute the environment more than cars do.
3. “Oh, no, we’re not going to have any casualties.” – George W. Bush discussing the Iraq war with Christian Coalition founder Pat Robertson in 2003, as quoted by Robertson.
4. “So Miss Fluke, and the rest of you Feminazis, here’s the deal. If we are going to pay for your contraceptives, and thus pay for you to have sex. We want something for it. We want you post the videos online so we can all watch.” – Rush Limbaugh
5. “I think the right approach is to accept this horribly created — in the sense of rape — but nevertheless a gift in a very broken way, the gift of human life, and accept what God has given to you… rape victims should make the best of a bad situation.” – Rick Santorum
6. “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways of shutting that whole thing down.” -Todd Akin
7. “When a physician removes a child from a woman, that is the largest organ in a body. That’s a big thing. That’s a big surgery. You don’t have any other organs in your body that are bigger than that.” – Mary Sue McClurkin, Alabama GOP State Rep.
8. “To redefine marriage is discriminatory towards those who hold the sincerely held religious belief that it is a sacred institution between a man & a woman.” – Illinois state Sen. Kyle McCarter (R), in response to the state Senate approving same-sex marriage in Illinois.
9. “I struggled with it myself for a long time, but I came to realize life is that gift from God. I think that even when life begins in that horrible situation of rape, that it is something that God intended to happen.” – Richard Mourdock, Indiana GOP U.S. Senate candidate.
10. “There is no one who doesn’t have health care in America. No one. Now, they may end up going to the emergency room. There are better ways to deal with people that need health care than this massive new program.” – Phil Bryant, Republican governor of Mississippi.
11. ”Feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women easier access to the mainstream of society.”-Rush Limbaugh
12. “[America has to import so many workers because] for the last 35 years we have aborted more than a million people who would have been in our workforce.” – Mike Huckabee
13. ”The feminist agenda is not about equal rights for women. It is about a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.” – Pat Robertson
14. “He is purple – the gay-pride color, and his antenna is shaped like a triangle – the gay pride symbol.” – Jerry Falwell’s warning to parents that Tinky Winky of Teletubbies, may be gay.
15. “Some girls, they rape so easy” – Roger Rivard, Wisconsin GOP State Rep.
Keep in mind that these are recent quotes, and as Mr. Chimpson says, he "could have easily come up with a top 100 list." Just about every quote is an exemplary example of Stephen Colbert's "truthiness," "a quality characterizing a 'truth,' according to Wikipedia, that a person claims to know intuitively "from the gut" or because it "feels right" without regard to evidence, logic, intellectual examination, or facts. From a commentary by CBSNews.com's Dick Meyer:
"My annual 'Award of the Year' goes to Merriam-Webster, the dictionary guys, for giving their 'Word of the Year Award' to the word 'truthiness.'
"Truthiness (no need for quotation marks anymore; it's a word now) is perfect for the times in every way. It is a fake word invented by a fake person, Stephen Colbert, the comedian whose character, Stephen Colbert, parodies cable news talk shows on his own cable show, 'The Colbert Report.' (Someone call in the Deconstructionist SWAT team, ASAP!)
"Webster's has now sanctioned truthiness with two definitions: 'truth that comes from the gut, not books' and 'the quality of preferring concepts or facts one wishes to be true, rather than concepts of facts known to be true.' At the end of his truthiness skit, Colbert says, 'I know some of you may not trust your gut, yet. But, with my help, you will. The truthiness is, anyone can read the news to you. I promise to feel the news "at" you.'
"Colbert actually performed this routine on his very first show in October 2005, proof, if any is needed, that this guy is a zeitgeist vessel in a big way. He has earned deconstruction.
"Truthiness is the definitive cultural and comedic acknowledgement of moral relativism. How's that?
"Truthiness actually has a long philosophic pedigree. It is called 'emotivism,' a term resurrected by a Scottish philosopher who lives and works in America, Alasdair MacIntyre. In 1981 he published one of the most influential works of moral philosophy in the later part of the 20th century, 'After Virtue.' MacIntyre defines it this way: 'Emotivism is the doctrine that all evaluative judgments and, more specifically, all moral judgments are nothing but expressions of preference, expressions of attitude or feeling. …'In this view there is no difference between saying "the death penalty is wrong" and "I don't like the death penalty."'
For the rest of the article, click here --> (http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/12/12/opinion/meyer/main2250923.shtml)
Hopefully, we have kept our word and provided everyone with a few laughs and a bit of an education, as we wend our way through the intricacies of the Conservative mind set - such as it is. In the meantime, we continue our fight to criminalize Conservatism, making our world safer for the 98 percent and a springboard for democracy once again.
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"Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon."
Woody Allen
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